A number of years ago Stephen Covey introduced the concept of a ‘pyramid of influence’, whereby successful influencers work on 3 aspects or ‘levels’ of influence, these being:

  1. Communication – what we communicate and how we communicate to those we wish to influence
  2. Relationships – the relationships we have with those we wish to influence
  3. Modelling – how those whom we wish to influence view our behaviour

Communication. At the most fundamental level, people are influenced by what we communicate and how we communicate with them.

For example; influencers

  • Recognise the right time to communicate (i.e. not when they or others are angry, frustrated, tired etc.)
  • Are clear about rules, limits, expectations and potential consequences
  • Discuss differences and resolve potential conflicts
  • Use powerful questions to facilitate and check understanding
  • Use clear assertive language
  • Ensure their body language is congruent with what you say
  • Promote the benefits to the individual/organisation of a particular course of action

Relationships. At the next level, people are influenced by the relationships we have with them. For example, we are more likely to influence others if we have a close, trusting and mutually respectful relationship with them than if we have a distant mistrustful one.

Effective influencers therefore:

  • Seek to understand others points of view before giving advice/direction
  • Listen
  • Genuinely ensure they understand other’s needs, positions and concerns
  • Make and keep commitments to other people
  • Use disclosure to build greater trust and rapport
  • Are influenced by others first
  • Do things for others without expecting anything in return
  • Admit to mistakes and apologise for them

Modelling. At the highest level, people are influenced most not by what we say but what we do. This is the concept of leading by example. If your actions do not match your words, others will not believe you.

Effective influencers therefore:

  • Are a model of restraint and self-control (i.e. don’t lose their temper in public)
  • Do what they say they will
  • Turn up on time to meetings, etc
  • Are genuine and sincere
  • Are patient with others. Patience is a practical demonstration of faith and respect
  • Refrain from criticising or saying unkind things about others (particularly in public)
  • Hold themselves and others to a higher standard of performance
  • Put safety before business results
  • Make the ‘right’ decision rather than the ‘popular’ one

The pyramid of influence is a powerful tool to enable you to examine what you do and focus on the areas where you can be even more effective. Our Improving Impact and Influence in house training course is designed to enable delegates to persuade and influence their peers and senior managers more effectively.